The first time I heard the notion that we have an internal dialogue I was surprised. I think that is because I had taken it for granted. My internal dialogue was part of my automatic way of thinking. I never stopped to look at and examine what I was saying to myself, and how my thoughts affected me. Years of meditation have given me a different perspective on this. The first thing you do when you meditate is to look at your internal dialogue. It is like a stream of consciousness and unless you are made aware of it, it just flows on and on. That is why it is called the ‘monkey’ mind or the ‘yenta’ in the mind.
One of the first things I have my clients do is to pay attention to what they may be thinking that brings on or precedes an action they are trying to change. This is obviously not limited to just changing the habit of eating. Let’s say you are trying to start a habit of daily exercise in the morning. You wake up and immediately the conditioned part of your mind is telling you that you don’t feel like it. That is where ‘You’ take over, and start changing the dialogue. If you don’t I guarantee you won’t feel like exercising. Even if you think about something enjoyable like the shower you take after you exercise, that is how simple it is.
Getting in touch with your internal dialogue which can be very automatic and even unconscious to an extent, is your first step to making meaningful change. You cannot change what you do not understand or see. This is another way of saying start becoming aware of the automatic reactions. The point is to have a choice. Some automatic reacting is useful. You don’t have to think about how you drive a car; you can leave that to autopilot. If you want to break or change a habit, whether it is to eat healthier, stop procrastinating or cut back on TV, it’s about creating a balance between autopilot and focus. That is what I think we are looking for.
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